Hell Hath No Fury Like Hogwarts Scorned
by QuillDragon23746
Summary: The time has long since come and the occupants of Hogwarts have finally had enough. Umbridge is going to get her comeuppance rather soon and she won't know what hit her. For all the Potterheads who want Umbridge gone faster than you can say 'Scram' COMPLETE!
1. Gang Up on Umbridge Year

**GANG UP ON UMBRIDGE **

**Disclaimer: Harry Potter shall belong to me only when hell freezes over.**

* * *

The students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry couldn't help but feel that incurring the wrath of Hades just might be a lot more enjoyable than remaining trapped at Hogwarts with the High Inquisitor of Hogwarts. And now, with Dumbledore gone, the situation took a turn for the worst. Granted, the Weasley twins' sense of humour provided a great relief and a lot of inspiration for the students they'd left behind at the school. Three quarters of the population of Hogwarts decided that they'd all suffered enough, and it was time to give as good as they got.

 _Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus._ Dolores Jane Umbridge will know just what messing with Hogwarts meant for her. _Never tickle a sleeping dragon._ She'd made the biggest mistake of her life and every fibre of her being was so going to regret it.

It was a Hogsmeade weekend, and most of the students had bolted to get out of the school, anywhere where _she_ wouldn't be breathing down their necks. The Three Broomsticks, Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop, Honeydukes, Zonko's Joke shop and even the Hog's Head was filled completely of the students of Hogwarts.

Harry Potter gazed on ruefully as his two best friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, began the trek up to Hogsmeade, sighing dramatically, knowing that Umbridge was around, probably dancing a jig at making him so miserable. Sighing again, he began the long trudge up to the Gryffindor Common room and quickly entered after muttering the password.

He grabbed his invisibility cloak, put it on, and went back out once he was sure the coast was clear. He headed to the statue of the one-eyed witch by the stairs leading to the DADA classroom. Tapping the hump with his wand and muttering, "Dissendium.", Harry entered the secret passage with a little struggle, finally managing to squeeze through, and made his way to the cellars of Honeydukes.

After he'd reached Hogwarts, he charmed his boots against making footprints in the snow and walked towards the Shrieking Shack. He'd had a rather tough time convincing the members of the DA that it was a safe place to meet, and three days later they'd all agreed, albeit reluctantly.

He took a deep breath, opened the door, and crossed the threshold, hoping the others had not stood him up. They hadn't. Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville, Luna, Colin, Dennis, Dean, Seamus, Katie, Alicia, Angelina, Parvati, Padma, Lee, Ernie, Susan, Terry, Michael and Lavender were present, waiting patiently for his arrival.

"Uh, Hi, guys." He muttered a greeting, and placed silencing charms and other protective spells on the doors and windows. "Now, nobody will know we're here."

"Harry, this really has gone on too long. We can't continue like this. We need to do something. Something big, that will ensure Umbitch gets the heck out of Hogwarts and stays out." Ron said, banging his fist vehemently on the wall to his side.

"Yes, Ron, I know. But the question is, what? What do we do? I'm already banned from Quidditch and Hogsmeade. She'll have a field day if she knew I've come here. Her detentions are torture. Literally. If our plan goes wrong and she catches even one of us, we'd be done for." Harry frowned.

"I have an idea, Harry. How about we have a 'Gang Up on Umbridge Year'?" Ginny suggested, after a few minutes of brainstorming. "Even the teachers could help us out. After all, they hate her just as much as we do, if not more. We could prank her like nobody's business. Each of us has some special quality. We can use them and make her life hell."

"That's smashing! We could even use muggle pranks on her." Colin cackled gleefully, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "But _what_ do we do?"

"I know! We can…"

All twenty-one of them put their heads together and came up with some really wonderful ideas. Everyone had quite vivid and creative ideas, and they couldn't wait to try them on her. with barely suppressed elation, they made their way out of the Shrieking Shack in twos or threes to avoid unwanted suspicion.

Harry, Ron and Hermione, as promised, met up with Dobby, the free house elf, to explain their plan to him and ask him for his help. He'd been euphoric that _Harry Potter and his friends_ wanted him to help them and practically fainted when Hermione thanked and hugged him for agreeing to help them.

Thus began a new chapter in all their lives.

* * *

 **That was just the beginning. There's a lot more to come, and Umbridge is so going to hell. If you have any ideas on how I can torture the toad better, please either review or PM me to tell me about them.**

 **Mischief Managed,**

 **QuillDragon23746.**


	2. Burning Blistering Hell

**BURNING BLISTERING HELL**

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me unfortunately.**_

* * *

The morning dawned bright and cheerful. The golden rays of the sun glided over the creature lying in bed and prompted it to snuggle deeper under the covers. After a few futile attempts at trying to go back to sleep against the wishes of the sun rays that so loved disrupting her beauty sleep, Dolores Jane Umbridge, got up from bed and stretched languidly.

"What a glorious day!" she exclaimed, gazing at the beautiful landscape outside her window with a wistful sigh.

 _I have a feeling nothing can go wrong today,_ she thought happily.

How so very wrong she was.

* * *

After a refreshing bath, she seated herself in an armchair beside her bed. Clapping her hands together, she called for a house elf.

"TIPPY!"

With a crack, Tippy arrived just before her and bowed low, her nose grazing the carpeted floor. "Yes, Mistress?"

"The Usual." She ordered curtly, barely glancing at the trembling house elf.

"Yes, Mistress." Tippy bowed again, and with a crack, vanished as quickly as she'd come.

Immediately, a plate laden with cream biscuits appeared on the coffee table beside her armchair, and Umbridge gazed fondly at the biscuits, before quickly grabbing one. It was customary for her to have cream biscuits every morning before breakfast. The golden crispy biscuits and the soft deep yellow cream filling looked good enough to gobble.

She popped one into her mouth, and the effect was immediate. Her eyes bulged as wide as dinner plates and her tongue felt like it had been dunked into the raging pits of fire in hell. And it was getting worse by the minute which no amount of sugar or water could control. She walked around the entirety of her quarters, tongue hanging out of her mouth like a dog, panting.

Once the burning had subsided enough for her to think as straight as possible, she went to inspect the biscuits. The biscuits contained a large amount of finely chopped chillies. So fine, that one wouldn't even know it was there. And instead of the cream, it was filled with mustard. No wonder her tongue burned the way it did.

Just then, a pop sounded loud in her bedroom, and Tippy showed up, carrying a plate of chocolate cream biscuits. "Tippy is sorry for the delay, Mistress." Tippy squeaked. "Yous biscuits is right here."

She placed the plate beside the already present one, and pooped out of the room, without waiting for a reply.

Umbridge did the one thing she had no qualms against doing at this very moment – she SCREAMED. Since her voice was so loud that the window panes rattled, she completely missed the unmistakable sound of a click of a camera.

* * *

Down in the kitchens, Harry, Ron and Hermione were rolling on the floor in laughter at the photo of Umbridge walking around, her tongue hanging out of her mouth and panting.

"Oh, I can't breathe." Hermione wheezed, clutching her stomach before promptly bursting into another fit of giggles. Harry and Ron weren't faring well, either.

After their laughing session ceased (Hermione burst into laughter again), they could finally manage to talk to Dobby.

"That was really clever of you, Dobby, hiding the actual plate of biscuits so Umbridge's house elf will take time to get it, giving you ample time to send the spicy biscuits to her." Harry said, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes.

"The Carolina Reaper, Dobby! Merlin, that's the hottest pepper in the whole wide world." Hermione exclaimed after making sure she wouldn't be susceptible to laughter again.

Dobby grinned, glad for all the praises he was getting.

"You deserve a big hug for that one, you know." Ron said, beaming.

Hermione grinned. "Be ready to give out plenty more of those hugs, Ron, because this is just the beginning. Just wait and watch what happens next."

 **There. This is the edited second chapter. Hope it was longer and better than the first one. Review and let me know what you thought of this.**

 **Mischief Managed,**

 **QuillDragon23746.**


	3. Fire Wood

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, however disappointing it is to know. and once you're done reading, please do review. You'd make my day!**

The silence ringing in the Great Hall was deafening.

Umbridge's jaw twitched as she kept her mouth clamped shut, her eyes blazing fire. Everyone were staring at her in shock, some with utter awe and some with something akin to slight horror on their faces. McGonagall completely ignored her and continued talking to Flitwick without missing a beat, as if this kind of spectacle often occurred in the Great Hall of Hogwarts. Snape looked suspiciously like he would burst out laughing and was having a rather tough time not doing so. After all, it wouldn't do to shatter his intimidating demeanour, which he'd acquired through the years, by uncharacteristically looking amused. But despite his best efforts, he could not suppress the small smile that played on his lips.

The tension in the Hall was so thick, it could easily be cut with a very blunt knife.

As the students had amassed into the Great Hall for breakfast that morning, they had noticed that Umbridge was already in a foul mood and couldn't figure out why, save for a few, who knew the exact reason and couldn't help grinning at one another from across the hall. The others had dared not cross her path, in fear that they might terribly regret it later.

So, naturally, it came as a shock to everyone when a few unidentified, brave culprits decided now was the perfect time to anger her further. Or maybe they were foolish (but that depends entirely on your outlook).

As Umbridge made to sit down on the Headmaster's chair at the alumni table, she did not notice the large amount of angry eyes that flashed at her, before a small smirk broke out on the faces of a select few. The minute she sat down, however, she landed with a thud on her floor, the students having cut out most of the seat and placed it back in its place, so no one was the wiser. The entire school gasped as one, as they took in the scene before them- the chair, a complete mess of splintered wood and a puffing Umbridge stuck inside the hole. She got up pretty quickly (for a toad) and with a quick wave of her wand, muttered, "Reparo." The rest had their eyes glued to her, not wanting to miss this.

The ones responsible for this sniggered quietly, before muttering, "Oh, I wouldn't do that if I were you." It was a pity (or not so much) that that old hag couldn't hear them, and, satisfied with her work, sat down on it again. For a moment, nothing happened, and everyone groaned in their head, sorry that there wouldn't be any more drama. When nothing happened even a few minutes later, Umbridge's sugary sweet smile made a reappearance, only to immediately vanish again and be replaced by a blood-curdling shriek as the chair burst into roaring flames.

She jumped out of the chair, her dress on fire, which prompted the flames to subside completely and the chair stood there innocently, as if it hadn't just been consumed by fire. Snape turned in his chair, quenching the sudden urge he had to laugh. Her dress was still on fire, and she was shrieking at the other Professors and Students to help her, but no one came to her rescue.

A little while later, however, she had somehow managed to quench the fire (where the hell was Filch when you needed him?), much to everyone's disappointment. And that is how they had found themselves in the situation they were currently in – you know, the hag glaring at them for all her worth (which was less than that a pea).

"I demand to know, who did this? Speak up now, and you will be let off with a few lines. If not, I swear to Merlin, the consequences shall be _severe._ " Those, who knew the actual meaning of writing 'lines' for Umbridge, cringed. Hell, their hands still occasionally bleed and sting. They hoped, for the culprit's sake, that whoever had done this, would not be caught.

Obviously, no one spoke.

"Very well. I shall soon find out who did this, and when I do, you will regret it!" Saying thus, she stormed out of the Great Hall, seething.

Ten minutes after her departure, the Great Hall was still silent. Then –

"Ha. Haha." Snape chuckled.

Pretty soon, everyone in the Great Hall was laughing hysterically. Some even toppled off their benches, clutching their stomachs. Even the members of Umbridge's Inquisitorial Squad had wide grins on their faces. Pansy Parkinson had to stuff her fist into her mouth to smother the giggles that were spewing from her lips.

After that, breakfast was a merry affair. Snape had been pretty unsuccessful in wiping his grin off his face and even Neville thought he didn't look scary with that smile, and that's saying something.

As students were milling into the corridors for their classes, Hermione, Ron and Harry followed and then caught up with Draco Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson, when there were relatively less number of people around. Hermione was the first one to break the silence.

"It was you, wasn't it?"

"Pardon? It was we what, Granger?" Malfoy turned around to face her.

"You did it. Dumbledore's chair. You cut it and then charmed it to burst into flames when Umbridge sat on it again."

"I suppose, they don't call you 'Smartest witch of your age' for nothing, after all." When she didn't answer, he sighed before saying, "How did you know?"

"Before coming here, she went to the chair to inspect it, since no one we asked had done it. That was where she found this." It was Harry who answered this time, before shoving a piece of cloth into his hand. It was a white handkerchief with the initials D.M. at one corner in Slytherin green embroidery. His Handkerchief. "Who else do we know that has the initials D.M., besides you?"

"Well, you got it right." He pocketed his hanky and then turned to go.

"Hey. Wait. Tell us, why?" Ron asked, looking quite curious and dubious at the same time.

"Why we did it? Well, it's obvious, isn't it? As much as we seem to like that old toad, that is all not true. It's just pretence. What do you think our parents will say, if we suddenly side with Dumbledore? Look, we, of all people, know what you say is true; that You-Know-Who has indeed returned. But we can't openly agree to it. Even if that's the right thing to do." Pansy looked ruefully at them. "So, we had to side with her."

"We were there, you know. In the Shrieking Shack, when you were planning that 'Gang up on Umbridge week' or whatever and we heard everything. So, we thought we could lend you all a helping hand."

"So, you put the chillies in the cookies?"

"What? No! I know nothing about any chillies. Anyway, next time you do something, do let us know. We'd love to help. You don't know how fun it is to finally do something against something your parents have told you to do that you hate. And yeah, don't tell this to anyone. You'll regret it big time if you do. I'll make sure of that." Malfoy hissed.

"Just one tip. Umbridge couldn't balance on ice-skates even if You-Know-Who threatened to kill her if she didn't." and with a wink, they hurried off to their next class. The trio rushed off to their own classes, already running late, but not caring too much about it.

~ 7 ~


	4. Icky Sticky

"Hem hem."

The Charms classroom fell silent at once, as the horribly familiar cough resounded across the class. Professor Flitwick, standing on a large pile of books, turned to face the doorway, and barely suppressed the cringe that threatened to appear on his face. Instead, he smiled tightly at the intruder, and invited her in.

"Headmistress Umbridge, Please do come in. What a pleasant surprise!" The entire class flinched as one at these words, not caring that they might be punished for their insolence.

After she had settled down in a corner, her notepad in hand, Flitwick resumed the class.

"We shall be learning the Sticking charm today. Does anyone know the incantation for this spell? Yes, Ms. Granger?" he asked when no one raised their hands.

"Epoximise. It's a very useful spell if you want to stick or secure an object in place. It is reversible, unlike the Permanent Sticking charm." She said.

"Very Good, Ms. Granger. Five points to Gryffindor. Now, the wrist movements are very important. If performed incorrectly, the spell could go terribly wrong. You rotate your wrist twice before flicking your wrist. Like so." He demonstrated the movements precisely. "Now, practice."

Soon enough, everyone was practicing. But this time, since the minute that toad had entered the classroom, Hermione had a plan brewing in her mind. Although she knew exactly how to do it and had done it on a number of occasions, even, she decided to play dumb.

The small box of wood that they were supposed to be sticking to their desks lay on the table in front of everyone. Hermione pointed her wand at her box and with wrist movements a little too fast and sharp, recited the incantation. The poor box went zooming from her table and crashed against the nearby wall and fell to the ground.

Harry and Ron, not to mention the rest, stared at her incredulously. Was this something the Know-it-all Hermione Granger couldn't do? And a sticking charm, of all things?

"Oops. Sorry." She said, loud enough for everyone to hear, not looking or sounding sorry at all.

"Ten points from Gryffindor for not being able to do a spell as simple as this one, Ms. Granger." Umbridge said, looking gleeful.

And that's how most of the class went by, Hermione deliberately not doing the spell correctly and Umbridge deducting points from her, looking more elated each time.

"What in the bleeding hell are you doing, Granger?" Draco, who was sitting on the seat behind her, somehow managed to whisper, his voice so soft, she almost thought she'd imagined it. "You're purposely having points deducted off your own house, in case you did not notice, Granger."

"Giving her a wrong sense of security. I know what I'm doing." She whispered back, just as softly.

As the class was dismissed, all the students shuffled out dejectedly. Not only the Gryffindors, but the other Houses were also sad about being put down by Umbridge.

Umbridge walked out looking as though she'd just been promoted to the post of Ministress of Magic. Although, it did not last long.

"Epoximise." Hermione muttered and Umbridge flew and stuck to the wall, at a great height.

"PUT ME DOWNNNNN." She screamed, waving her hands frantically.

Everyone just stared at her, trying desperately to not allow a smile to break out on their faces.

Professor Flitwick tried to bring her back down, but was unsuccessful (it's not like he tried really hard, after all).

"I'm sorry, Headmistress, but this spell is a really powerful one. I can't imagine who could have done it, but it will take some time before I'll be able to reverse it."

Shaking with uncontrollable mirth, they made their way down to the Great Hall for lunch, all of them glad that she won't be joining them.

"Impressive, Granger." Draco grinned momentarily at her, before assuming his vacant expression. Harry and Ron hugged her tightly.

The best part was when Flitwick came up to her and said, "I am so proud of you Miss Granger. Ninety points to Gryffindor." Thereby, reversing the deduction of points and giving her extra ten points.

The students grinned widely at each other. This was only the beginning. There was a lot more to come.

 **Disclaimer: I do not own HARRY POTTER. The credit for that goes entirely to JKR.**


	5. Mirror Mirror

"You have to admit, what the other houses are doing is rather impressive. We did a bit in assisting them but we'll do something of our own too."

Draco Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson were sitting in Draco's dormitory, discussing what they could do to help the rest of the school in their fight against Umbridge. As mentioned once before, they never enjoyed nor looked forward to that old toad's classes. They were no fun and if Hermione Granger, the one who loves to read and always finds the solution to any problem in books, doesn't find reading the Ministry assigned books fun, well, you can't expect anyone else to.

"You're right, Draco. And I have a plan. Mother says I always used to do it when I was a baby and it drove my parents up the wall. So, what say you? Ready to be a bay again?" Pansy asked, grinning as if someone brought her the moon.

"Let's hear it then 'cause I'm all ears." He laughed.

… … … …

"Wands away. There will be no need for talking."

DADA class was going on and most of the students were staring into space and occasionally pretending to read their text books whenever Umbridge walked past them; that is until –

"Wands away. There will be no need for talking." Draco and Pansy repeated after Umbridge.

"Mr. Malfoy and Ms. Parkinson, may I know what you are doing?"

"Mr. Malfoy and Ms. Parkinson, may I know what you are doing?" they repeated it again, looking scared and angry at the same time.

"What is the meaning of this?!" Umbridge looked furious but the Slytherins were far from done.

"What is the meaning of this?!" they said in with the same volume and tone that the toad had used.

"Professor, I think someone has jinxed them. They only repeat what you say." Tracey Davis, a fifth-year Slytherin girl said, looking at her house-mates, who were nodding their heads vigorously, with something akin to worry.

"Do you know who hexed you?" Umbridge asked them, trying to ignore her temper.

"Do you know who hexed you?" they said again while shaking their heads.

Everyone else were trying really hard to smother their laughter that was threatening dangerously to spew out of their mouths. Only Harry, Ron and Hermione seemed to know that they were just pretending, as opposed to someone using a spell on them, if their sly smile was anything to go by. The two Slytherins winked lightly at them before continuing to look like deer in headlights.

And so it went on, Umbridge saying something, it being repeated by Draco and Pansy and finally, she getting so worked up over this that she left them off early.

But that wasn't all. Apparently, they'd taken it upon themselves to follow her around too.

"Don't use your wands in the corridor." _"Don't use your wands in the corridor."_

"I demand to know who has done this!" _"I demand to know who has done this!"_

"Stop this at once!" _"Stop this at once!"_

"You shall be severely punished." _"You shall be severely punished."_

"Students!" _"Students!"_

…And on it went for the rest of the day. During dinner time, the two of them were seen apologizing to Umbridge profusely for "Repeating everything you said today and making you look like the world's biggest TOAD", although they were secretly not sorry at all and quite enjoying this.

… … … …

It was quite late into the night, yet Dolores Umbridge had been unable to get a wink of sleep. If this is how life was going to be at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, she would prefer to stay away from this place. As far away as humanly possible.

She sighed. She would owl Cornelius Fudge tomorrow. He would know about this, maybe then it will stop.

… … … …

She can keep dreaming!

 **A/n: Hope you enjoyed it. My school is starting in a few days and since its my final year, there is a lot of pressure. So, I will post a lot less quickly. Please bear with me here.**

 **I am so glad many people like this story. Thank you so much!**


	6. She wouldn't know what hit her!

Dark times lay ahead, and with Voldemort's return to power (as much as Cornelius Fodge and his bunch of daft idiotic officers, including Umbridge, tried to convince the Wizarding world that this was not true, it most certainly was. And if you can't believe it, you can rot in hell, and nobody could care less), the darkness seemed overwhelming. It was just a pity that the Minister for Magic was being a right prat, assuming Dumbledore was his enemy and trying to take over the educational system of Hogwarts. Seeing what was going on, he was successful. The only things the students learned from the bloody Ministry-assigned books was just theory and how NOT to use their wand. When confronted by the enemy, you couldn't bloody likely start reciting the stupid books, now, could you? You'd be walking to your grave in two shakes of a duck's tail.

So, you couldn't blame Ron weasley when he had to bite his tongue, drawing blood, to stop himself from yelling bloody murder at the old toad currently 'hem hem'–ing in front of the fifth-year Defence Against The Dark Arts class, and giving her a shake so hard, her teeth would rattle. Since he couldn't do that, he settled for closing his fist so tightly his knuckles turned stark white.

Beside him, Harry was trying really hard not to just run out from this class and go round banging his head on anything solid (preferably walls and really heavy books), like a raving lunatic.

Seated in front of them, Neville had come to the conclusion that he wouldn't sit around like a coward anymore, and start helping his classmates in making that bitch's life Hell. Tonight, he decided. He would put his plan to action tonight.

... …. …. …. ….

The clock beside his bed read 1:00 am when Neville woke up and ready to play his trick on Umbridge. His only hope was that she was a deep sleeper.

He quietly made his way out of the Gryffindor common room and towards Umbridge's personal chambers. It wasn't until he was a little bit away from there, that her door that he noticedhe wasn't the only one seeking entry into her chambers. Hiding behind a stone statue, he watched as the two figures attempted again and again to unlock the door, but to no avail.

"By the Great Salazar! She's barricaded this door by goodness knows how many spells. None of our spells are working!" One of them cursed, and Neville froze. He recognized THAT voice, alright. But what was HE doing here?

"So we can't dye her hair pink?!" the other one pouted.

Seriously, what in the blazes is going on here? Thought Neville. And they won't even leave!

After some time, and with no patience left, Neville decided to show himself. If they don't leave, he would make them himself. He was part of Dumbledore's Army, after all. Plus, Harry really seemed to believe in him.

Stepping out from behind the statue, he came to stand right in front of the couple, who looked startled to see him. A few minutes passed and the couple were still staring at him with shock. "What are YOU doing here?" one of them finally asked. "I could ask you the same, Malfoy. And what about the pink dye?" He asked looking from Malfoy to his partner and back again.

"Well, we got a bit sick of her. So, we... I got the idea to dye her hair pink." Parkinson back-tracked quickly after receiving Malfoy's nasty glare. After all, Longbottom wasn't supposed to know about this side of him, no matter what. "What about you?"

"I have something planned. Maybe, we could all put our plan to action. It'll be hilarious."

Draco smirked wickedly, but quickly dropped it again. "But that blasted door just wouldn't open."

"Maybe you've got to use the muggle way. She wouldn't put any spells against that." Neville ventured. "You know, pick the lock. I borrowed Hermione's hairpin." The other two just gave him a are-you-bloody-crazy look. "Oh, alright. I'll show you."

A second later, he whooped silently as the door creaked open. Draco and Pansy were thinking that they must learn to do this, it might come in handy sooner or later. "I mustn't forget to thank Fred and George later for teaching me how to do this." Neville muttered under his breath. They went in quietly and the Slytherins sprinkled some dust over Umbridge's eyes. "This'll make sure she sleeps throughout this and not get up while we work on her." Draco explained to Neville before each of them set to work. About half an hour later, they stood uplooking quite pleased with themselves. "Nice one, Longbottom." Pansy whispered to him.

After charming the mirror, they all went back to their dormitories, thankful, that Filch was sick and couldn't patrol the corridors. Each of them looked forward to what would happen tomorrow morning. With a huge smile adorning their faces, they were claimed by deep slumber.

... ... ... ... ...

The next morning, the Great Hall was rather more noisy than usual, but Unusually, the teachers did not try even a little bit to calm the students down. Let that old toad do it, they thought. Let her suffer. The main topic for the day's gossip were the series of attacks Umbridge had to go through. The ones who were aware of the criminals didn't give away themselves, but silently patted themselves on the back. They deserved it. Those who were unaware of their identities, silently admired and congratulated them on a job well done.

It wasn't until the toad in concern entered the Hall, that it fell silent. They couldn't believe what they were seeing. Apparently, Umbridge herself hadn't seen it and so had chosen to venture into the Great Hall. The teachers were at a loss for words. they could only gawk in an undignified manner at the Headmistress (Headmistress, my foot!). Completely oblivious to or choosing to ignore the great amount of attention she was receiving, Umbridge made her way to the alumni table. She didn't even react to the whispers that broke out in her wake.

"Did that fool dye her hair **_florescent pink?_** Its so disgusting!"

"Eew! _"_

 _"_ Merlin's beard! I knew she was insane, but now she's way beyond that. And what happened to her eyebrow?"

 _"_ Did she shave one eyebrow OFF? ONE?"

The whole day, people would laugh at her behind her back. They laughed so hard their stomachs hurt like crazy. Some even took pictures of her to send to their parents back at home. Hell, someone even went to the extent to send it to WITCH WEEKLY. Later, most people realised that she had no idea about how she looked, and their admiration for the pranksters grew ten fold.

It didn't come as a surprise to anyone when she started screaming her head off when she looked into the mirror (not hers). Draco and Pansy high-fived each other and sent a discreet wink to Neville during dinner when she looked like she'd tried to pull her hair out.

Life was so much better now.


	7. Pinocchio (well, sort of)

**Disclaimer: I shall own Harry Potter only when Hell freezes over.**

 **This is the next chapter and it'll be a while until I next update since school has begun, and I'm pressed for time. You know, it could even be months. Sorry for that.**

 **Please review if you really enjoyed it.**

… **. …. …. …. ….**

The stars were dancing playfully in the moonlight. There was not a single cloud in sight. Harry Potter sat by the window in the Gryffindor common room, looking out into the night sky, quite late into the night. He'd been unable to sleep, having the same nightmare again in addition to another in which Umbridge figures out who were the ones pranking her and expelled them. Then he would have to go back to living with the horrid Dursleys, unable to have any form of contact with the Wizarding World he'd grown to be quite attached to.

If that old toad's nose was to grow every time she irritated, hurt or disgusted someone, in a way like Pinocchio, it would be greater than the Great Wall of China and be seen even from space. The minute he was aware of just what he'd thought, his eyes sparkled with amusement. If he could somehow manage to pull this off, imagine the amount of entertainment the whole school would get. Now, he just had to figure out what spell he could use to manage this feat. He needed to go to the library and he had to get there _now._

Jumping from his seat and rushing into his dormitory, he scrambled around for his invisibility cloak. After a few minutes of searching, he held it triumphantly in his hand and then, seeming to realize just why he'd needed it in the first place, he put it on and made his to the library.

A couple of hours and many muttered profanities later, he found the book that contained the required spell. Now, he just needed to learn it.

... …. …. …. ….

Three days later, he was still trying to master the spell. He wouldn't be much sorry if the spell were to go wrong and somehow hurt her more than necessary, but there would be no fun in that. So, with renewed vigour, he set about mastering it. In his free classes, in the bathroom, under the bed, in abandoned classrooms, every time.

So, that was how Ronald Weasley found his best mate. In an abandoned classroom, brandishing his wand at a relatively harmless teddy bear.

"What are you doing, mate?" he asked, looking confusedly between Harry's face set in concentration and the toy.

"Trying to make its nose grow long." He answered.

Now, Ron looked even _more_ confused. "And why would you do that? It looks cute just the way it is. Leave it be." He said.

"So, once I get it right, I can use it on Umbridge."

With a sigh, he tried again. And when he did, the cute nose of the teddy bear elongated about half a centimetre.

With, a loud whoop, he knew he was ready. He would be able to hear that toad's screams again, and that seemed to be gaining the first place in his list of favourite pastimes – hearing her scream like a banshee.

…. …. …. …. ….

They had her class immediately after breakfast. As they made their way towards her classroom, Harry filled Hermione in on his plan, she couldn't help but pull him into a fierce hug.

"It's brilliant! It's just like Pinocchio." She exclaimed.

"That's where I got this idea from." Harry mumbled.

Ron, not understanding what in the world 'Pinocchio' was, thought it best not to feed his curiosity, or he might end up with a long lecture from Hermione about taking Muggle Studies and on how this 'Pinocchio'-thing worked, much like the last time he asked what a 'Ferris Wheel' was.

"Hem hem." They heard from the doorway, once they'd all entered the classroom.

A small smirk on his face, Harry shot the spell at her, causing her nose to grow a tiny bit. However, it wasn't yet noticeable. Her coughing to get attention really was annoying. He'd been extra careful, so she won't be able to see that he had his wand out.

As the class progressed, her nose had grown half a centimetre long and was slightly noticeable, if the whispers Harry heard about her nose were any indication. Although it was clear she had yet to know something was wrong with her nose.

This wasn't the last bit. There was a lot more, and by the end of the day, he was sure he'd have given the entire school (teachers included) something more juicy to talk about.

…. …. …. …. ….

He found great pleasure when he got several opportunities to shoot the spell at her in the corridors in between classes. He always made sure to do it only if she said or did anything annoying, hoping she'd get the hint and stop, so they could all have a _peaceful_ day ever since her arrival at the school. No such luck. Alright then, he won't complain.

The next time he saw her, was in the Potions classroom. Apparently, she still felt the need to continue with the inspections of the teachers. She was seated in the corner on a stool, a notepad in hand and scribbling furiously.

He didn't know why he had never noticed certain similarities between this toad and that Skeeter woman. Both felt the need to scribble horrible lies on sheets about people and were extraordinarily maddening. Enough said.

Setting to work on the potion Snape had assigned, Harry made sure to keep an eye on her, just as she was doing to him. From the looks of it, she'd come to inspect _him_ and not _Snape._ If it went on that way, he'd be unable to hex her, in any way, shape or form.

He was saved thrice from his impending doom by Hermione, who would swat his hand away from his cauldron if he seemed to be putting the wrong ingredient in. Silently mouthing a word of thanks as she did it again, he went back to observing Umbridge, before realizing she wasn't sitting on her stool any longer.

She was up talking to Snape in a hushed tone, looking more menacing with each word that came from her mouth. It wasn't until he saw the colour drain from his Potions Professor's face until he pulled his wand out again.

He'd vowed to punish her for insulting or harming any person, and he was bound by it. Snape was the most bat – ish, slimiest person he'd ever had the misfortune to meet, but he was still a person. So, Harry's vow applied to him too.

Taking a deep breath, he shot the spell at her, and watched as her eyes grew as wide as saucers, as did everyone else's, except his two friends, who seemed to be having a lot of difficulty hiding the laughter that was just _waiting desperately_ to spew out of their mouths. Shooting them a quick grin, he turned his attention on Umbridge, who was stuttering and waving her arms around wildly, gesturing to her three inches long nose. It caught Snape's head who turned a murderous look at her before turning it to Harry.

He seemed to be conveying solely through his gaze that he knew this was Harry's doing, and he was going to pay for it later. Oh, well, at least it was worth it.

Umbridge paid no attention to the whispers breaking out in her wake, as she hid her nose behind her hands and fled from the classroom, although not before letting out a scream so shrill, Harry thought his ears were in danger of falling right off.

Snape followed her enough, so that he'd reach Harry and say so quietly, Harry might not have heard it at all. But he had and he was stunned.

He could have sworn all the money in his Gringotts vault plus his Firebolt, that Snape had said, "Twenty points to Gryffindor for reminding me of my favourite muggle classic that I seemed to have forgotten about. Well done, Potter."

You can't really blame him for standing there gaping like a fish out of water, now could you?


	8. Love you to hell and back: Part I

**LOVE ME TO HELL AND BACK: Part I**

Molly Weasley sat at the dining table in the kitchen at The Burrow, completely and totally baffled. She read and re-read the letter in her hand, clearly not comprehending what had been written in it. It was completely mind-boggling that her only daughter had written her a letter that literally whined about the severe cold she had, and how even Madam Pomfrey's Pepper-Up potion just refused to do the trick. And then, she'd abruptly changed the topic to how she had heard some seventh year girls talking about love potions and how to slip them to some of the boys. Then, she asked if she could please send her a bottle of cough drops.

Now, even if she ignored the fact that Madam Pomfrey's Pepper-Up potion has never lacked in entirely curing the children's colds, she sudden mention of love potions was what had truly perplexed her. Was she planning on slipping Harry Potter some love potion? No, of course not. Ginny would never do that (even if she had been infatuated, maybe even loved, the boy since she'd first heard of his famous story when she was five).

Then why, in Merlin's name, did that girl want a bottle of love potion, disguised as a bottle of cough drops? Yes, after about two hours of trying to figure out what the hell her daughter had meant in that letter of hers, Molly had finally come to this conclusion. The question was : Why?

Knowing that her daughter definitely would have a good reason to be making such an outrageous (and subtle) demand, and that she would not make any inappropriate uses of it, Molly quickly got dressed. A trip to Diagon Alley was in order!

Ginny Weasley smiled wickedly to herself, as she steadied the little, over-excited owl Pigwidgeon and gently took the letter and package from it. She absent- mindedly fed him some owl treats as she busied herself with opening her letter.

 _Dear Ginny,_

 _I can't, for the life of me, think why you would need some cough drops, as I am very confident that Madam Pomfrey's Pepper-Up potion would not fail in its purpose. Even so, since you felt the need to request me to send it to you, I have enclosed it with this letter. I really do hope that Pig would be able to carry the weight of it and that you would make good use of the cough drops and will feel better soon. Do send my love to your brothers, along with Harry and Hermione._

 _Love,_

 _Mother._

Ginny smiled silently at the implications her mother had subtly sent in the letter, after all, it just wouldn't do to have Umbitch know about her little plan for her. Well, not for a long time anyway.

She yelped when she saw that it was almost midnight, and she needed to wake up early tomorrow to put her plan into action. If all went according to plan, Umbitch would surely be tearing her hair out and cursing really loudly tomorrow at this time.

The next evening saw Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in a turmoil. A big one, might I add. They stared incredulously at each other and then at the pink and white streamers that hung beautifully from the ceiling in front of the great hall. Pink and white roses were used to decorate the place and it looked absolutely smashing! The doors of the Great Hall looked like the gates of heaven, but this was nothing. The minute the doors opened to reveal what was there inside, nearly everyone was about ready to pass out from shock.

The Great Hall was completely transformed. A really large chandelier made of glass and diamonds hung spectacularly in the centre of the roof. The signature sky-view of the Great Hall had been removed. The Hall looked like a church. Silk streamers of white colour was draped around the benches. The four House tables were nowhere in sight.

"What is going on, here?" Professor McGonagall asked, weaving her way through the throng of students. When she reached the doors, she clearly saw what. She stood there, gob-smacked, unable to utter a single word.

It was then, that some kind of force pushed them all into the Hall, and dropped them onto the benches like a sack of potatoes, and the doors slapped shut behind them. They looked around wildly when bells started ringing and the doors again opened to reveal Umbitch dressed in a sickly bright shade of pink, holding a bouquet of white roses in her hands. She had that sickly sweet smile on her face, but her eyes looked unfocused.

And then, Argus Filch, the caretaker of the school came wobbling around to stand beside her, his legs and hands being tightly bound together. He even seemed to have a silencing charm put on him, so he could do little more than nod his head, roll his eyes, look murderous… and whatever it is that he did. He even looked like he just might punch Umbitch if he could.

And then, the dreaded marriage ceremony began. Umbitch walked slowly (and yet too fast) towards what was supposed to be an altar, where a priest was standing. Funny, no one seemed to have noticed him before now. All the while, Filch kept twisting and turning in his binds, hoping to get as far away from the scene, as humanly or heavenly possible. It was clear even to a blind person, that he was being forced into this and that he would never in his life attempt anything even as remotely dangerous as this.

Once the Priest had given his rather long (and a little boring) speech, it was time for the 'I do's. Filch looked like someone had asked him to donate both his kidneys, he was that panic-stricken.

Umbridge, however, was completely oblivious to this, and happily said her 'I do' and it was Filch's turn all too soon. Everyone eagerly straightened in their seats, wanting to know the outcome of this, rather interesting, day.

"NO! NO, YOU CAN'T MAKE ME DO THIS!" Filch seemed to have regained the use of his ability to speak once again, and was hell-bent upon using it to the fullest, lest it should be taken from him again. "YOU'RE UNDER A LOVE POTION, MISTRESS. COME BACK TO YOUR SENSES." At the cost of his own voice box and the eardrums of everyone else present.

That explained her behaviour, though. She had been acting pretty weird all morning and most of the afternoon, providing a bit of entertainment in their mundane lifestyle.

She just smiled sweetly at him, and pointed her wand at his throat.

"Oh, I will get married to you, Argus, whether you like it or not. Even if I have to force you to do it. I love you, after all, don't I?"

Then, the last thing Filch remembered was hearing Umbitch.

"Imperio!"

 **Hey, guys. I am so sorry for the delay in updating. Anyway, this is the first part of chapter 8 of Hell Hath No Fury Like Hogwarts Scorned. Hope you like it and please review to let me know what you think.**

 **If you have any suggestions as to what more I can do with Umbridge, please send them to me via review only. I will not accept PMs. regarding this.**

 **Thank you.**

 ****************88**

 **P.S. Harry Potter belong to JKR only.**

~ 1 ~


	9. Love you to hell and back: Part II

**LOVE YOU TO HELL AND BACK: Part II**

* * *

*****************FLASH BACK*******************

After getting her Mum's letter and the love potion disguised as cough drops, Ginny finally decided to retire to bed. The next day was going to be a long one and she needed as much rest as she could get. In spite of knowing this, though, Ginny really didn't feel like sleeping at all. It was like a lot of mice were playing Exploding Snap inside her stomach (not to mention the giddy – happy feeling she got every time thinking about how Harry would react after he found out she had done what she was going to do. He would probably be damn impressed and he may, may be, start to see her for who she really is, and not just some silly shy little schoolgirl who had had a major (like, major major) crush on him since she'd first imagined herself being a damsel in distress and him being a knight in shining armour on a broomstick come to save her from the scary Death Eaters).

(She was four, by the way, when that was the law of the world she'd lived by. So, don't judge her on it).

A lot of tossing and turning later, Ginny finally fell into a restless sleep, waking up in the middle of the night several times, because she had dreams about Umbitch's impending doom which were so funny, she'd wake up hearing her own laughter at them.

*HP*HP*HP*

The next morning, Ginny grumpily kicked her screeching alarm clock shut (Molly had charmed it to screech when she woke up ten minutes late, put warm water on her if she woke up twenty minutes late and pour ice cold water on her if she is late by even one second after that. Needless to say, after having ice cold water poured on her when she was five, Ginny knew not to mess with the alarm clock). She stumbled out of bed at the unholy hour of 6: 30 am and, after covering herself with a coat for extra warmth, made her way down to the kitchens.

She tickled the pear in the portrait and slipped through the entryway. She found most of the elves grabbing a few hours of precious sleep while the ones that were awake and making breakfast, quickly surrounded her.

"Good morning, Miss!" one of them squeaked eagerly. "What is Miss wanting? Can Frilly get something for Miss? Cakes? Cookies? Hot chocolate?"

"Oh, Hello. Actually, I didn't come here to eat, Frilly – you said your name is Frilly, yes?" Ginny asked.

After a while, when Ginny didn't say anything and continued staring at her, Frilly realised that she wanted a response.

"Oh. Oh, yes, Frilly. Frilly is me." She squeaked turning a little pink.

"Well, Frilly, I was wondering if I could meet Dobby. Could you get him for me, please?" Ginny asked.

The little elf immediately ruched off to get Dobby after screeching, "Yes, Miss."

When Frilly came back dragging Dobby by his hand, Ginny flashed them both a quick smile. After Frilly had gone elsewhere, she began to tell Dobby her plan. Dobby was to pour all the contents of the bottle that she gave him into Umbridge's morning cup of coffee/ tea and ensure that only she drank it. Dobby happily agreed and promised that no one would know about it.

Her job done, Ginny flounced happily back to the Gryffindor common room to get a few minutes of sleep and to freshen up before breakfast.

Now, after Umbitch drank the love potion, she will fall in love with the first male person she sees. She giggled gleefully.

Meanwhile, Dobby had completed his part of the deal and had ensured that Umbitch drank the potion laced tea.

*HP*HP*HP*

Umbridge sighed happily as she placed her now-empty cup of tea on the table, feeling warmth course through her veins.

There was knock at the door, and she instructed them to come in. Filch poked his head inside.

"There is a letter from Minister Fudge for you, Mistress." He said.

But Umbridge didn't hear anything. She could only think about how good Filch looked, how sweet he really was and how she really really wanted to kiss him.

And so she did.

Needless to say, when the kiss ended, Filch looked scandalised and didn't waste any time bolting from there.

It was far from over, though.

She next caught a glimpse of Filch in the Great Hall, when she was having breakfast with the other teachers and the students, and that glimpse in itself was enough to bring the uncomfortable emotion of love crashing into her.

She jumped up from her seat, causing her chair to topple over backwards and launched herself at his unsuspecting back. She wrapped her arms around his neck, shouting, "Oh, Argus! You don't know how much I love you!"

The entire Hall burst into peals of laughter at this spectacle. Some fell off their seats while some thumped each other heartily on the back, while yet others rocked back and forth in their seats so fast, you would think they would shoot like bullets towards the walls opposite them.

Umbitch, however, was completely oblivious to all this, and was concentrating on not losing to Filch in their little game of wrestling. He was trying really hard to peel her hands from around him and dash to the exit. Eventually, though, he succeeded and bolted from the Great Hall faster than Harry's Firebolt.

So the rest of the day went on. Umridge would try her darned best to get him to be alone with her so she could hug him and tell him how much she loved him. She followed him around like a lost little puppy. In abandoned classrooms with a bouquet of flowers, in a broom closet with a box of HoneyDukes' finest chocolates. His anguished screams could be heard echoing around the castle, causing many a students and teachers to chuckle appreciatively. He was found running around the corridors like a madman, trying to escape her smothering kisses and hugs.

The last they had seen of the two love birds was when Umbridge was dragging a reluctant Filch with her to go to Hogsmeade for some thing or other.

*****************FLASHBACK**************

* * *

 _ **Last chapter :**_

" _Oh, I will get married to you, Argus, whether you like it or not! Even if I have to force you to do it. I love you, after all, don't I?"_

 _Then, the last thing Filch remembered was hearing Umbitch._

" _Imperio!"_

 _*HP*HP*HP*_

* * *

 **Back to present:**

Filch immediately turned rigid and faced the priest. He looked like he was fighting against Umbridge, but couldn't quite achieve it. Everybody knew what Umbridge was going to have him do, and while most of the teachers would have liked to protest, they were rendered completely incapable of doing it. They could just stare in utter surprise.

Ginny didn't know what to do. Sure, the whole thing had been a good laugh, but she hadn't expected it to go this far. May be pouring the while bottle in her tea was a really bed idea.

Filch was going to give in. "I d-"

Luckily, he was cut off, by Umbridge herself.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" she screeched. Apparently, the effects of the love potion had worn off. Just at the right time, too. Ginny sighed out of relief. "WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?"

Filch, who wasn't under the Imperius Curse any longer, hurried to explain. "Somebody gave you a love potion, Mistress. And you wanted to marry me." He finished lamely and winced at the last sentence.

"Ugh! Whoever did this will pay! You hear me? YOU'LL PAY!" Umbridge screeched before running out of the Great Hall, no doubt to her room, as Filch trudged back to his living quarters, so bloody glad that he hadn't married the old toad, after all.

The silence in the Great Hall was tangibly thick. It was so thick, that it could be cut with a blunt knife. They all stared at each other stupidly, completely baffled by the events of the evening.

"Well, the party is over, children. Let's all have dinner and have a good night's rest, shall we?" Flitwick quipped.

And just like that, everything was back to normal. Well, as normal as it can be for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

* * *

 **Hey, guys. I am so sorry for the delay in updating. Anyway, this is the second part of chapter 8 of Hell Hath No Fury Like Hogwarts Scorned. Hope you like it and please review to let me know what you think.**

 **If you have any suggestions as to what more I can do with Umbridge, please send them to me via review only. I will not accept PMs. regarding this.**

 **Thank you.**

 **P.S. Harry Potter belongs to JKR only.**

 **Also, I REALLY REALLY NEED ideas for Hell Hath No Fury Like Hogwarts Scorned. I'm running out of them. PLEASE PLEASE SEND ME SOME.**

 **And, I have a target of 50 reviews and request you to help me achieve it. I have the next three chapters ready and will not post them until I achieve it.**


	10. Slytherin & Mythology: Part I

**SLYTHERIN AND MYTHOLOGY: PART I**

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me.**_

 _ **HPFAN: Aww, Thank you so much for the lovely reviews and since you're the only one who has given me around 10 reviews in succession, I'm posting this chapter just for you, even though I've not got my target of 50 reviews. No matter. I'll just keep trying for more. Anyway, Thanks once again and keep reviewing**_ __ _ **.**_

 _ **Also, I just couldn't resist posting this chapter. I am so excited for it, and I hope you love it as much as I enjoyed writing it. No more deadlines, though. Keep reviewing at your own convenience, just do review. I'm obsessed with them.**_

After the love potion incident, Umbridge was leaving no stone unturned in trying to find the person/s responsible for it, and almost everyone suspected that if they were caught, they might have to face expulsion from the school, maybe a taste of Umbridge's Blood Quill (her Cruciatus, too) and possibly a brief stint in Azkaban as well. All in all, it was going to be an unpleasant experience for him or her. Harry was really worried for that brave person and kept trying to find out who had done it. So far, his efforts were in vain, for it seemed that the person was hell-bent upon keeping his or her identity unknown and they were doing a pretty darn good job of it too.

So far, Umbridge's search for the 'culprit' consisted of Decree Number Goodness Knows What. According to it, she had every member of the Inquisitorial Squad keep an eye on a 'select few' suspects. Well, mainly, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and other members of Dumbledore's Army. They were allowed to tail the 'suspects' even in their common room ( _How can a Slytherin enter the Gryffindor Common Room?_ This was one of the many protests that the students had). This completely stopped any interaction they might have had and allowed them no way of communicating as they were always being watched.

One day, though, they became really lucky as the ones tailing them were none other than Draco Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson. Now, they were seated in the Gryffindor Common Room, way after normal sleeping hours. Hermione had casted a silencing charm around them so no one will be the wiser.

"Alright. So, which one of you is the love potion 'culprit'?" Draco asked, doing the air quotes for the word culprits. "I need to know so that I can try to save you from Umbridge's wrath. And, I promise on Salazar Slytherin's dead body, that I will not disclose the information to anyone else, least of all, Umbitch."

When the Gryffindors only stared incredulously at him, Pansy hastened to explain, "We're not asking you as the members of the Inquisitorial Squad. We're asking as the two students who hate Umb itch just as much as you do, want her gone from not only this school, but also from this world and those who even helped you prank her."

It was Ginny who answered, albeit in a small voice.

"Uh, I did it. I had loads of help from Mum and Dobby. Mum sent me the love potion in a bottle of cough drops, so Umbitch will not have an inkling about it and I had Dobby pour it into her cup of tea that morning. I, of course, didn't expect it to go as far as the marriage, but then again, I can't really complain as it was pretty entertaining and funny." She coughed nervously.

There was a split second silence before Harry engulfed her in a bear-hug. "Oh, Merlin, that was you! I was so worried you might get caught. That was an amazing, ingeniously brilliant plan, by the way! Good on you, Gin! You're awesome!" He flashed her his lopsided grin, and all she could think of was, 'guys with drop-dead gorgeous grins like those should be declared as dangerous or all girls would start collapsing immediately.'

So, of course, everyone started praising her and congratulating her. Ginny, though, was stuck in a bubble of 'Harry said I am awesome. How cool is that!'

"…Gin? Hey? Ginny!"

"What?" She said when she hastily rose out of her stupor. "Oh. Sorry. Just zoned out. So, what were you saying, Pansy?"

Pansy shook her head at the girl. It was obvious to anyone with half a brain cell that she was head-over-heels in love with the Potter boy, but she refused to tell him (Merlin knows why!).

"Yes, so as I was saying, what is our plan next? I vote we continue the same way. Umbitch'll expect us to lay low for a while and will not expect a sudden attack. So, we'll do just that. The question is: What, though?" She continued.

"I was hoping for something Slytherin. Literally. You know, involving snakes. Alive, ones." Draco declared.

"I want to do something related to Muggle mythology." Harry said at the same time that Draco said his.

They both stared at each other for a few minutes, before Harry gave a loud whoop and grinned ecstatically at them all. "I know! Why don't we combine both of them together. Listen up. I have an idea."

And he proceeded to tell them his brilliant plan. By midnight, they'd all agreed on the next prank, stifling their giggles as they went back to their dormitories. Tomorrow couldn't come sooner.

 _ **Keep reviewing! Good night, sweet dreams, sleep tight!**_

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	11. Slytherin & Mythology: Part II

**SLYTHERIN AND MYTHOLOGY: PART II**

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me, unfortunately. Now, on with the story...**_

* * *

"Harry! Wait for me! Harry!"

Harry, Ron and Hermione spun around, looking for the source of the voice when they spotted Neville frantically gesturing to them to wait and desperately trying to weave his way through the throng of students going to their classes.

When he finally reached them, he stood with his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath while wheezing like a broken down engine.

"What's wrong, Neville?" Harry asked, noticing the frown on Neville's face. "Did something happen?"

"It's bad, harry. Very bad" Neville said forlornly, once he'd caught his breath. "We're all so dead. We can't escape now. She'll know, harry. There's no way out of this." He looked so miserable that Ron suspected he might either fall to his knees in the middle of the corridor and bawl his eyes out like a silly little girl or jump right off the astronomy tower. Both the options were equally terrible.

"You're not making any sense, Neville." Hermione said, gesturing for them to continue walking towards their next class, which happened to be Transfiguration. "We can't escape out of what? Calm down and tell us everything from the beginning, Nev."

Instead of answering, Neville crammed a scrunched up piece of parchment into her hands, yelped and hissed, "Run!" int0 her ear before scrambling off in the direction of the transfiguration classroom.

Stunned, and staring wide-eyed at Neville's retreating figure, Harry, Ron and Hermione just could not comprehend his behaviour. That is, until…

"Hem hem."

 _Ah! Oh no! Urgh!_

Harry clenched his fist so tight, that his knuckles could compete with Voldemort's chalk-white complexion. Hermione squeezed her eyes shut, hoping to Merlin that the person standing behind them was not who she thought she was. Ron scrunched his nose up in distaste and muttered a string of extremely inventive profanities under his breath, that, should Molly have heard him, she would have chased him around the grounds of Hogwarts threatening to disown him.

As one, they turned around to face their scariest nightmare (who also goes by the name of Umbridge), who gave them a sickly sweet smile.

"And what, may I ask, are you three lovely children doing out here in the corridors at this time?" She asked.

Discreetly glancing at her watch, Hermione realised with an inward groan and a shudder, that, as they had been talking to Neville, time had mischievously flown past, leaving them standing in the opposite wing of the castle, ten minutes into class.

 _Merlin's baggiest pants!_

"Um, we, we were just…um…" Hermione wracked her brain, trying to think of the most plausible excuse she could come up with, but she could think of nothing.

Umbridge tutted. "That would be ten points each from Gryffindor for skipping class." She gave them a smile that was so evil, that even Voldemort would have cowered in fear before it.

"Wha-! That's wrong!"

"Thirty points!"

"Gulping Gargoyles! But we weren't even skipping class. Bloody hell!"

Her smile grew wider. "Maybe, more thirty points for questioning the Headmistress and for your language, Mr. Weasley. Now, if you three will follow me, I believe we have a few things to discuss. I will also be speaking to your Head of House to ensure you will receive your rightful punishments."

The three followed Umbridge to her office in a strained silence, murdering looks on their faces. It was then, that Hermione remembered the reason they were in this situation in the first place. Quickly opening the piece of parchment she still clutched in her fist, her eyes widened dramatically as she read the note that was scribbled on the parchment.

 _Doing everything possible to ensure she doesn't know_

 _Rampaging Hippogriffs won't distract her from her mission, though._

 _Anything she offers will contain veritaserum, beware._

 _Can't have you spilling your secrets, so take care._

 _Oh, should she find out who pulled those pranks,_

 _Most definitely will they go down to her lowest ranks._

 _P.S. be careful. Don't panic. We're working on it._

The note wasn't signed, but the first letters of each sentence vertically spelled out a name: DRACO. M., so it was obvious who it was from. Harry frowned when he read it, looking over her shoulder, while Ron scowled in Umbridge's direction.

They quickly reached her office, and Hermione hastily put the piece of parchment deep into her pocket, lest Umbridge should find it. Harry growled low in his throat, when they reached the stone gargoyle, marking the entrance to Dumbledore's office. Umbridge, for her part, looked very gleeful, and this brought worried looks from the teens.

"Cornelius Fudge." She shouted the password at the gargoyle and it sprang aside to let them enter the enclosed escalator. Harry growled again at the password, fingers twitching to wrap themselves around the neck of the toad walking ahead of them.

"Ms. Granger, would you like a cup of tea?" She asked, and without waiting for an answer, practically dragged Hermione into her office, gesturing to Harry and Ron to wait outside.

Once inside, Hermione was suddenly very aware that the office was too pink in colour, enough to make her gag violently and the meows of cats were going to drive her up the walls. Still inspecting her surroundings, she soon realised that she and Umbridge weren't the only ones present.

No, Filch was there as well, looking like the cat that got the canary. He sent her a nasty look that promised immense pain and suffering in the next few minutes.

"Don't just stand there, dear. Sit down." Pouring tea into a cup for herself and Hermione. She slid the cup towards Hermione, who was hesitantly seated across from her. "Here. Drink it up and then we can talk."

She stared intently at Hermione, interlocking her fingers.

Hermione gulped. There was no way she could escape from drinking this because Umbridge was staring keenly at her and then after drinking it, she was sure to tell her all about their decision to prank her and everyone involved in it and Draco and Pansy will get caught, their cover ruined, and they'll get detention and then nobody will trust her again and they'll hate her and she'll be expelled from Hogwarts and –

"Hem. Hem." Umbridge coughed slyly, gesturing towards the cup and raising an eyebrow at Hermione, silently challenging her to deny drinking from the cup.

A crisp short knock on the door deterred the two from their staring contest.

"Enter." Umbridge said.

The door opened to reveal Draco Malfoy. Other than a fleeting glance over the top of Hermione's head, he didn't acknowledge her presence at all, and that was just as well, because he would have laughed out loud at the expression on her face. She looked like she would weep with joy, knowing that he would save her from having to drink the tea containing veritaserum.

"Headmistress, I am pleased to inform you that Pansy and I have found the culprits of the prank war aimed at you." Draco smirked, eyes glinting maliciously.

Hermione gasped and gawked wide-eyed at him. _He wouldn't, would he? No, he promised. But, he is a Slytherin. He could very well have been playing us this whole time._ Hermione sagged in her seat. They truly were done for now. There was no way out of this.

Umbridge looked as ecstatic as a toad could look. She was practically drooling, gazing eagerly at Malfoy to just be out with it already. Filch looked like he'd been given a hundred Mrs. Norris – s for him to do with what he pleased. It was either that, or he was just excited to hand the culprits from the ceiling with their tongues and give them a good thrashing, which Umbridge was sure to give him permission to do.

"Who are they, Mr. Malfoy?"

* * *

In the owlery, a lone figure sat hunched over, awaiting the arrival of its owl. It was a good fifteen minutes before it arrived, and the figure jumped to its feet and hurried over to untie the package from the owl.

"Good job, Thunder. Here, have this." It crooned to its owl, feeding it some owl treats. "You did very well, today."

 _This is it._ The person thought. _No time like the present. They've done enough damage, already, and its time I set things right. They wouldn't know what is coming for them, even if it bites them on their rear end._

Cackling malevolently, the figure tore out of the Owlery, intent upon completely ruining its target.

* * *

 **Hey, guys. I am so, so, so sorry for the delay. I finished my end-of-year exams just yesterday, and have finally got the time to work on my fanfics. Hope you enjoy it and don't forget to review.**

 **Also, here's a preview of my story –I Fancy You, Granger. Please check it out and let me know what you think via reviews. I get my inspiration to update faster from those little comments.**

 **I Fancy You, Granger.**

 _She gave a last angry shriek before bolting towards the castle, causing Draco's smirk to instantly vanish when he caught sight of her tears. Belatedly realising that he may have gone too far this time, he tore off after her, frantically searching for her before he found her. He reacted instinctively, paling, genuine pangs of guilt plaguing his heart. "GRANGER, NO!"_

" _If… if what you're saying is true, Malfoy, then you have a very strange way of showing your affections." Hermione stammered._

 **So, there. How was it? Interesting enough to look it up and post a review?**

 **Mischief Managed,**

 **QuillDragon23746.**


	12. Slytherin & Mythology: Part III

**SLYTHERIN AND MYTHOLOGY: PART III**

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me, unfortunately.**_

* * *

Harry was pacing around outside Umbridge's office like a caged lion hungry for prey. Ron had slid to the floor and was seated with his knees pressed to his chest, hugging them, and watching Harry like one would watch a table tennis match, head turning side to side. It had been almost fifteen minutes since Hermione had been dragged inside the office and just around five minutes after Draco had entered, assuring them that he'd handle it. So far, not a word could be heard outside, and the two boys were worried sick for their friend.

Just then, Pansy came barrelling up the escalator, startling the two of them, and making Ron squeak like a mouse being trodden upon, although, he would deny it if asked.

"Pansy!"

Not sparing them a single glance, she knocked politely on the door and then opened and entered the office without waiting for a response from the old toad. She clicked shut the door with finality.

* * *

"Who are they, Mr. Malfoy?" Umbridge asked, looking impatient.

Draco sneered slightly. "I think, Headmistress, it would be more prudent if you questioned Ms. Granger on this matter. After all, she is the know-it-all of the school. She should know who did this, shouldn't she? Especially, if it is a friend of hers."

Hermione stared at him, eyes as wide as saucers, before she gathered her wits about herself, and growled low in her throat at him. She turned to face Umbridge with a scowl on her face. "I'm sorry, _Professor_ , but I know nothing of the students pranking you. Mr. Malfoy seems to have got everything wrong."

"Then, Ms. Granger, I'm sure you would have no problem taking a sip of that tea and beginning to answer any questions that the Headmistress may have." Draco grinned cruelly.

Gulping, Hermione took a tentative sip from the teacup, wishing the floor would open up and swallow her whole. _That two faced liar! How dare he? I'll make him pay for this, if it's the last thing I do._

A polite knock on the door brought her from her reverie, and she glowered in Pansy's direction when she entered the office without waiting for permission.

"I apologise, Headmistress. I had a rather tough time trying to bring the culprits to you, but they managed to escape me." She panted, like she'd run for miles. "However, I do know who they are, so you can punish them however you see fit."

Nodding to Pansy to let her know she'd heard her, Umbridge turned her attention to Hermione. "Now, dear, tell me, do you know who are the ones pulling the pranks on me?"

Nobody noticed Pansy giving Draco and Hermione a frightened glance, and everybody ignored Filch when he began to hum merrily, fantasising about the time that he would get to punish the students.

Hermione's answer shocked everyone, including herself. Only Draco seemed to have expected this answer and looked supremely indifferent.

"No. I don't know who are pranking you. I never have." Hermione looked like she might faint. Hadn't she just had a sip of tea that was laced with veritaserum? Then, why wasn't she unable to lie? She wasn't going to complain, though.

Now, positively seething, Umbridge ordered a dejected Filch to leave her office at once, and glowered frighteningly at Hermione, who had to resist the urge to scoot back in her seat.

"I see. Well, if that is how it is going to be, Ms. Granger, I think I'll have to use more drastic methods. A small dose of the Cruciatus curse should do the trick, wouldn't you say?"

Hermione gasped. "You wouldn't do that!" she cried. "I've not been lying."

Umbridge brandished her wand threateningly, but before she could even think of saying the curse, Draco had his wand trained on her, and was muttering something that sounded suspiciously like Latin. Umbridge's eyes grew glassy and she lowered he wand like she was in a trance, which was true.

"Pansy, do you have the crystal with you? Good." Draco took a crystal from her hands, and placed it on her desk. "Memoria damnum. Memoriae hic." He murmured again and again.

Hermione was still in shock over the spectacle and Pansy looked hopeful.

A white wispy kind of liquid began to flow from Umbridges's temple into the crystal, as a red glow began to surround her entire body. At last, it stopped, and Draco sat down in the chair beside Hermione's. "There. It's over. All done."

This brought Hermione from her shock. Peeling her eyes from a still-dazed Umbridge, Hermione locked her gaze onto Draco.

" _You!_ " she screeched. "Ask Ms. Granger. She is the know-it-all of the school so she should know who is pranking Umbridge, right?"

"Hey, don't blame me. That's the best I could do to buy us as much time as possible before Pansy came. Besides, I knew there wasn't veritaserum in the tea, so even if you had it, you wouldn't really give away anything." He said, looking pleased with himself. "She's asked me to get the vial of veritaserum from Snape and I'd switched it with a vial of water. She didn't know the difference."

"Well, what did you do to her just now?" Hermione asked, curiously.

"It's very old magic. I'd read about it in one of my father's books. I took her memories of this little episode and collected them in this crystal, which Pansy had her mother owl to her. Only, unlike with memories for a pensieve, these memories cannot be viewed by anyone, and once I desroy this crystal ball they'd vanish for ever, as she won't remember them." Draco said, gesturing towards Umbridge. "She'll come back to her senses once we leave from here."

"As for Filch, we'll do the same to him. I'm sure he's waiting outside to know what happens." Pansy added.

Now, happy that they'd not been caught, the three of them walked out of the office, only for hormone to be tackled to the ground by Harry and Ron. After lots of questions were asked and answered, Draco proceeded to do the same procedure to Filch, who happily walked away to his quarters.

* * *

It was dinner time, and Harry, Ron and Hermione had already filled Ginny, Neville and Luna in on the events of the day. They'd roared with laughter at that and instantly all tension had fled from their bodies.

Umbridge was seated in Dumbledore's chair, suspiciously eyeing the happy chattering of the members of Dumbledore's Army. She knew something was going to happen, but what, she had no idea.

Draco glanced surreptitiously at Harry and gave a subtle nod. Harry nodded back. It was time. A swish of Harry's wand in Umbridge's direction and a muttered, "Anguis!" and her hair transformed into snakes. Draco brandished his wand at her subtly and murmured, "Ut Viveret!" The snakes suddenly started hissing and spitting, scaring Umbridge half to death. She screamed as loud as her lungs allowed and tore off from the Great Hall, trying in vain to turn her hair back.

The other teachers jumped aside, wondering just what had happened, before one of them started laughing, which set the whole of the occupants of the Great hall into hysterics.

Harry and Draco gave each other a two-fingered salute, on a job well done.

* * *

 **There! Another chapter.**

 **Thank you so much for reviewing. I am so happy with the number of reviews I've received and can't wait to get more. I crave them.**

 **So, anyway, I'm glad you liked the chapters. I don't have a preview to post here, so I'll give you an inkling as to what you should expect in the next chapter.**

 **Umbitch will get a taste of her own medicine, thanks to Hermione.**

 **The chapter should be up by tomorrow. So, keep reviewing.**

 **Mischief Managed,**

 **QuillDragon23746.**


	13. Never Mess with a Sister's Brother I

**NEVER MESS WITH A SISTER'S BROTHER: PART I**

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me, unfortunately.**_

 _ **I got a few reviews and PMs stating that the last chapter was not quite clear.**_

 _ **It goes like this: Pansy is the person who got the parcel from the owlery. It was a crystal, in which one can save memories. But this crystal, unlike a pensieve, doesn't allow you to view them afterwards. Once the memories are placed in the crystal, they're gone forever. It is ancient magic and Draco decided to use it on Umbridge to get rid of her memory of the encounter in the office.**_

 _ **There was supposed to be veritaserum present in the tea which Umbridge gave to Hermione, in hopes that she may reveal the identity of her pranksters. Draco, being in the Inquisitorial Squad, knew about this, so he switched the vial of veritaserum with a vial of water before it reached Umbridge. So, essentially, the tea contained water, not veritaserum. Also, Draco had to play the part of a loyal member to her Squad, and pretended to almost give away the identity of the pranksters. In reality, he was just buying them some time because, to extract and remove the memory from Umbridge, it was essential for Pansy to bring the crystal, or it would be useless. She would still remember it. After the memories are placed inside the crystal, it is supposed to be destroyed.**_

 _ **Hope this cleared everyone's doubts. If not, let me know, and I'll probably edit the chapter.**_

 _ **Now, on with the story….**_

* * *

Umbridge slowly placed Harry's copy of _The Dark Arts: Detailed Defence Techniques_ back on Harry's desk. Her face was scrunched up in fury and her lips were compressed into a thin, angry line.

"Mr. Potter, you will accompany me to my office after class for your detention." She said evenly and marched off to her office, dismissing the class with a casual wave of her hand. "Class dismissed." Nobody moved a muscle.

Harry stared at her retreating figure and scowled. Angrily, he began stuffing his books and writing materials into his satchel, trying to ignore Hermione and Ron's looks of concern.

"Don't worry, Harry. She can't really harm you. You've done nothing wrong." Hermione said, sounding as if she was trying to convince herself more than him.

Harry smiled ruefully at her, before swinging his satchel over his shoulder, turning on his heel and following in Umbridge's footsteps. "That has never really stopped her before, has it?"

He strode towards Umbridge's office, expecting his head to light on fire any minute now, what with all the burning gazes of the students in his classroom trained on the back of his head. His hand twitched in anticipation of its impending doom. _I don't think I can take any more,_ he thought miserably.

He dreaded the detention, which was definitely going to be unpleasant. Umbridge wasn't going to care if what he'd done was right or wrong. She took great pleasure in torturing him, and he knew it. No one could stop her anyway, with Dumbledore gone. But he knew he'd done the right thing. Times like these, it was of utmost importance to be well aware of any kind of defence mechanisms as was possible. You never knew when it would come in handy. So, no, he hadn't done anything wrong.

This thought, however, didn't stop his heart from racing as he neared the Gargoyle marking the entrance to Dumbledore's office. His stomach clenched painfully as he thought of what was to come. The thought of spending even one more evening with the stupid toad and her blood quill made him want to throw a temper tantrum like a two year old. Oh, what a relief it would be to be able to stomp all over the ridiculous excuse of a Defence book they'd been assigned by the Ministry and _bombarda_ the sodding cats on the walls of the office she used to occupy.

Instead, Harry took a deep breath, said the password, ascended the escalator and knocked lightly on the door, afraid that if he knocked too hard, he just might break the bloody door down in his anger.

"Enter." Her saccharine voice said and harry had to stifle the urge to gag. Harry braced himself for sugary-voice overload, opened the door, and crossed the threshold.

Umbridge was seated at her desk, her earlier anger seemingly evaporated. She smiled pleasantly at him as he entered and Harry had to fight down the impulse to turn tail and run. "Sit down, Harry."

Her pleasantness completely unnerved him and he hesitantly lowered himself in a chair opposite her desk. He sat stoically, knowing that a happy Umbridge was always a frightening Umbridge. "Mr. Potter, you made a very grave mistake in going against the Ministry."

Cringing, Harry awaited the announcement of his punishment with batted breath, but couldn't help firing a retort at her. "What? Which Educational Decree did I miss? 'Students are not allowed to read anything other than the Ministry assigned books and those found guilty will be sentenced to Azkaban'?" he asked snidely, not bothering to conceal his disgust.

"It seems that writing lines has failed to achieve the desired effect." She simpered. "Maybe a more drastic approach to punish naughty students should do the trick. After all, desperate times call for desperate measures, don't they?"

Naughty students? Was she for real? "I've done nothing wrong and you know it." Harry barked.

Her simpering smile never faltered. "See, Mr. Potter, this is the kind of attitude I wish to stamp out of you, and I will do it. After all, the Minister has given me complete authority to punish naughty children how I see fit."

Harry clenched his jaw at her persistent use of the word 'naughty'. The urge to throw a temper tantrum returned tenfold and he managed to settle for banging his fist on the desk. "Ah, Harry. Temper, dear, mind your temper."

Harry growled at this. "I'm not a child!" he protested hotly. "Stop treating me like one."

Her simpering smile widened at this and Harry realised his mistake a second too late.

"As you wish, Mr. Potter." She smiled sweetly at him, before casting a silencing charm on the door, the various portraits lining the walls of Dumbledore's office and even covered the portraits with a fine silk black cloth for good measure. "Shall we begin your _adult_ punishment, then, Harry?"

Without waiting for a reply, she shot her spell at him.

It happened so swiftly, that he had no time to dodge the spell. His entire body suddenly erupted in white hot fire as her spell crashed into him. It seemed like a raging inferno throbbed inside of him.

"CRUCIO!"

* * *

It seemed like forever before she let him off, and Harry collapsed into a heap on the floor. He hadn't uttered a single sound and he'd be damned if he let the tears pooling in his eyes roll down his cheek. He blinked them back rapidly, and moved to pick his satchel from the floor, where it had fallen when she'd begun her 'punishment'. After about a few minutes of complete agony, he'd been forced to write five hundred lines with the dreaded quill, and his hand was dripping blood onto the floor.

She'd also had the audacity to ask him to _thank_ her for _disciplining_ him. He'd decided to grace that morsel of sparkling nonsense with a snort, gotten to his feet and marched out of her office with his head held high.

Once outside her office, though, he'd sprinted to the Gryffindor common room, not seeing where he was going as his eyes had clouded over with tears he was too proud to shed.

Hermione had had quite a shock when he'd narrated the turn of events and had enveloped him into a bear hug, crying hysterically into the crook of his neck. Ron had simply offered him plate of dinner he'd saved for him, his ears turning beet red, the only indication of the anger simmering just below the surface.

Harry had then allowed himself to let go of all his emotions and he'd sobbed into Hermione's hair, who had still not let go of him.

A delicious dinner and a flood of tears later, Hermione had insisted on singing Harry to sleep, saying it would get her mind of things. It didn't fool either of the two boys, sure she just wanted to hold Harry and be assured that he was quite safe more than anything else. She truly had been really shaken up.

Unable to resist Hermione's puppy dog eyes, Harry'd allowed himself to be pampered by her, and he'd fallen into a calm, nightmare-free deep sleep.

' _Rock a bye baby, on the tree top,  
When the wind blows the cradle will rock.  
When the bough breaks the cradle will fall,  
And down will come baby, cradle and all._

 _And down will come baby, cradle and all.'_

* * *

Deciding that Bill Weasley would be the best option to help her to plan her revenge on Umbridge, Hermione quickly penned him a letter, charmed it so only he could read it, and sent it through one of the school house.

 _How dare that old toadface hurt my Harry? Well, she messed with the wrong person. A sister always takes care of her brother just like the brothers does to his sister. Harry is my brother and she's messed with him. She will regret this till the end of her sorry excuse for a life._

* * *

 _ **Hey, guys. How is it? Good? Bad? Review and let me know. I can't wait to see your reviews.**_

 _ **Mischief Managed,**_

 _ **QuillDragon23746.**_


	14. Never Mess with a Sister's Brother II

**NEVER MESS WITH A SISTER'S BROTHER: PART II**

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me unfortunately.**_

* * *

"What's the matter, Bill? You seem worried."

Bill Weasley started, almost dropping his fork and knife, before placing them carefully on his plate of roast potatoes and chicken. He smiled at his friend who was seated across from him on their table and shook his head in the negative.

"It's nothing, Frank. Just a letter I received earlier today. Not that important, only something my mum wants me to do. I don't want to, but don't know how to say no to her." Bill laughed along with his friend at his own comment, knowing just how true it was. He really was unable to say no to his mother, no matter how much he didn't want to do the task she'd set him.

Satisfied with Bill's answer, his friend went back to his extremely tempting roast potatoes and chicken, and Bill heaved a sigh of relief. The sender of the letter had trusted him on this, even though they didn't really know each other, and he wasn't about to tell anyone what was mentioned in the letter.

A delicious lunch and an intense discussion over some matter or the other regarding Gringotts later, Bill grabbed his cloak, hat and gloves and was out the door, waving a quick goodbye to his friends, Frank and Paul, promising to be back for a game of Exploding Snap by five in the evening.

He apparated to Diagon Alley with a pop and found himself standing outside Ollivander's Wand shop. Muttering hurried greetings to those who acknowledged him, Bill quietly ducked into Knockturn Alley, his hood covering his face and keeping his identity well hidden.

What he needed could easily be found here with little or no unwanted and unnecessary questions asked. Making sure his face was completely covered and that no one would recognize him, Bill sauntered into shops after shops, at last finding the item required.

Triumphantly clutching it in his hand, he apparated back outside his house and began penning a letter, enclosing the required item in it. Rereading the letter he'd received earlier in the day, he decided that he had done what was required, and quickly sent it with the owl who had brought the letter, and had stayed until he replied, as was instructed.

The letter went like this:

 _Dear Bill,_

 _I hope this letter finds you, and all your family, in good health. How is it going at Gringotts? All good, I hope._

 _When I stayed over at The Burrow for the summer, we had an intense discussion about invisible ink, different ways of finding it in the Wizarding world and whether or not you can find it in the Muggle world. We couldn't complete our discussion and I still stand by what I said then. The Muggle world has ways of writing in invisible ink, too, whether you believe it or not. Your father will be very excited to know about this and how it is done._

 _One of the most prominent ones is using orange juice. It's pretty simple, really. Just squeeze an orange and collect the liquid. Dip a pen (the muggle version of a quill) in the juice and begin to pen anything with your very own, extremely cheap invisible ink. The only way one can be able to see the invisible writing is by dunking it in water. Try it out and see if you don't believe me. The only bad side to that is that the letter gets destroyed in a matter of a few seconds._

 _Now that that is off my chest (I had to prove to you that muggles have a way of making invisible ink even though you didn't believe me when I said so at your home), I was wondering if I could, maybe someday, accompany you to Gringotts. I've always wanted to see the goblins at work. They intrigue me so._

 _Anyway, I'll not take any more of your time. I'm sure you're very busy. Hope to hear from you soon._

 _Loads of love,_

 _Hermione._

Of course, they had not had any such discussion and he found it odd that she wrote to him about something that hadn't happened. Then he'd realised that it had been a clue to read the actual letter that she'd written using invisible ink. He knew for sure that dunking the parchment in water was not the solution to reading invisible words, and that only heat could do the trick.

As he'd assumed it would, the real letter appeared after a while of holding the parchment over fire, and he hadn't known what to make of it.

 _Dear Bill,_

 _If you're reading this, it is quite obvious that you've managed to not be fooled by the faux letter. The thing is, Umbridge has been intercepting our mail. I didn't want her to read this and there is no way I could get the item that I need, without leaving Hogwarts._

 _Of course, there was a high possibility that had she really intercepted this letter, she'd be fooled into dipping it in water, completely ruining it. Not many wizards know the muggle way of reading invisible words. But it was a risk I was willing to take, and if we succeed, then it would most definitely be worth it._

 _Now to the topic at hand. I know you may be wondering why I've written to you, but you have to know that most of the others either would adamantly refuse to do it (it is very dangerous), or are unable to do so, even if they wanted to. I need you to go to Knockturn Alley to get the item, which can most definitely be found there._

 _The item that I need is called a Blood Quill. I don't know whether you've heard of it, but it is a Dark object and certainly illegal. So you may have to go incognito to Knockturn Alley to find it, assuming, of course, that you agree to help me. Whatever your answer, though, I really would owe you one if you didn't mention this to anyone. They'll all murder me on the spot and feed my remains to the Giant Squid._

 _The owl has been instructed to stay until you write back, so you can take your time. Thank you so much._

 _Eagerly awaiting your reply,_

 _Hermione._

* * *

Hermione was sitting on her bed in the dormitory, reading a very interesting book she'd found in the Room of Requirement, and taken for some light reading. This book had given her some brilliant ideas, which had impelled her to write Bill a letter, and hope to Merlin that he would agree to do what she'd asked of him.

If he did, she knew what she had to do and had already perfected the required spells. It had taken her some time, but had finally managed it. Now, it all depended on Bill's answer.

A tap on her window pane brought her out of her reverie, and she glanced at the window to see the owl she'd sent to Bill. Barely suppressing an excited squeal, she skipped over to the window and threw it open, letting the owl enter. Feeding it some owl treats, Hermione grabbed the envelope from the bird's talons and ripped it open.

Opening up the folded piece of parchment, Hermione held her breath as she began to read it.

 _Dear Hermione,_

 _You're right. I did try out your technique and it does work wonders. So, it goes without saying, you won our little debate, and I rest my case._

 _As for visiting Gringotts, I'm sure we can come to an agreement. The elves wouldn't be very understanding of it, but we'll talk it out._

 _Hope you're having a good year so far._

 _All the best,_

 _Bill._

Hermione let out the breath she'd been holding with a _whoosh._ Frowning, Hermione put down the parchment. She was truly disappointed. Bill had been her only hope to getting the damn quill and even that turned out bad.

Suddenly, she paused, her nostrils catching a whiff or oranges from the letter. Understanding dawning on her, she grinned wide as she created inflammable fire, and held the letter over it.

Slowly, brown words began appearing on the back of the parchment, and Hermione watched with bursting anticipation and bated breath as she waited for it to completely show itself.

At last, the whole letter appeared and her ravenous eyes eagerly devoured the letter. By the time she'd reached the end, a large grin was dancing on her lips.

 _Hermione,_

 _I don't know why it is that you needed this item, and I can only hope it isn't something dangerous or that it would get you into serious trouble. For whatever the reason, though, I know you wouldn't do anything to tarnish your good reputation (Ron has been drilling this into my head since you two first became friends in your first year)._

 _I've enclosed it in the envelope. I hope this is the right thing I've got, and not made any mistake. If I have, don't hesitate to write to me and I'll immediately rectify it._

 _Do be careful while using it. You know what it s and what it does._

 _Take care,_

 _Bill._

She hurriedly searched the envelope for the quill and whooped softly under her breath after finding it.

Umbridge really wouldn't even have dreamed about what was going to happen to her tomorrow. _Even if you pray to all the different deities of the world, Umbridge, they won't come to your rescue tomorrow. None of them._

* * *

Umbridge received an owl from the Minister of Magic Cornelius Fudge the next morning when she was seated comfortably in the Great Hall munching on bacon and eggs. It was an agreement of one kind or another, which required her signature.

Everyone else seated in the Great Hall watched with barely concealed amusement at the way the owl hooted reproachfully at her and pecked her hand sharply with its beak, causing her to shriek very loudly and stop the urge to jump up and down in pain.

Hermione smiled when she saw her take a quill out of her pink purse and narrowed her eyes in anticipation of the impending SCREAM.

She was not disappointed. Just as Umbridge began writing, for the first time, she experienced the kind of pain Harry had had to undergo due to her detentions. The only difference here was that even if Umbridge wanted to stop writing, she couldn't. Only Hermione had the authority to grant her mercy and stop the quill from continuing to work her hand over the parchment. She didn't even have control over what she wrote. They were, of course, courtesy of the spells she'd learned from the book from the Room of Requirement.

The occupants of the Great Hall eyed Umbridge with varying facial expressions. Shock, indignation, horror, excitement, fear, happiness, amusement, anticipation, satisfaction, smugness, pride and the like. Seeing Umbridge getting what was coming to her, really made the day of everyone present.

They had quiet laughs over the words that were etched onto the toad's forehead in her own blood. _I'm a toad who doesn't know a right from a wrong, a truth from a lie._

Nobody knew the identity of the prankster, and Hermione preferred it that way. It wouldn't do for Umbridge to find out who'd done this, because, Hermione knew, she truly had crossed a line with this one, however much it was justified.

It had taken about ten hours before Hermione had deemed it enough punishment for Umbridge and stopped the quill from writing anymore, but by that time, Umbridge already looked like death warmed over.

Everyone had gone to bed by the time Hermione stopped studying, so she really did get a great shock when someone grabbed her from behind just as she was going to ascend the stairs to the girl's dormitory. Her shriek of terror was muffled by the soft shirt the person wore, before she recognised the person who'd grabbed her.

"Harry!" she cried, a hand over her heart, when he finally released her from his teddy-bear hug. "You scared me senseless!"

"Sorry." Harry said sheepishly, not looking sorry at all. "Thank you, 'Mione."

"For what, Harry?" Hermione frowned, not knowing what he was thanking her for.

"For what you did to her." Harry didn't have to mention who _she_ was. "And don't try to deny it. I know it is you."

Hermione smiled at him, ruffling his already messy hair. "Well, she had to learn the consequences of messing with a sister's brother. It was about time."

And with a quick goodnight, she was one her way into the dormitory, leaving a teary-eyed Harry behind.

* * *

 **There, this chapter is over too. Hope Hermione was up to your expectations, and do let me know what you thought of her.**

 **Mischief Managed,**

 **QuillDragon23746.**


	15. The Grand Finale

_**THE GRAND FINALE**_

 _ **Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to the ever-amazing JKR only, not to me unfortunately.**_

 _ **Also, I'm sorry for the delay. I'd gone for a vacation with my family and unfortunately, there was no Wi-Fi network there. So, here it is and here we are.**_

 _ **I won't take any more of your time and let you read on….. Hoping you haven't lost interest in my story.**_

* * *

Professor McGonagall was angry. Fuming. Annoyed. Livid. And it was all because of that damn toadface. It was because of her that Gryffindor house didn't have three of its Quidditch players, both the beaters and its seeker. And what was more, she hadn't been able to take her revenge on old toadface either. Grrr.

She was pacing around her office, wearing a hole in her carpet, and not bothering about it at all. Something had to be done. She was sure the students had tried their best to drive that madwoman away from Hogwarts, running hither thither like a headless chicken. It was time to take drastic measures. An all-out war, if you will. After all, desperate times call for desperate measures, don't they?

Deciding that a meeting with Professors Snape, Flitwick and Sprout was imminent, she headed towards each of their private chambers to have a word with them, thankfully undetected by Umbridge.

Although a little grumpy at being woken up in the dead of the night to discuss the date and time of a meeting, the Professors had quickly come to a conclusion that they'd have to have an all-house meeting with their respective houses and decide what it is that they are going to do.

The perfect opportunity presented itself when Dolores Jane Umbridge had to visit the Ministry of Magic for some important matters, and all the Heads called an all-school meeting in the Great Hall, calling off classes mid- day.

"This can't go on for long." Professor McGonagall said, looking very grim. "It is time that we show everyone that we give as good as we get."

" _Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus._ That is the motto of our school and Dolores Jane Umbridge is soon going to find out just what it means." Professor Snape ground out between clenched teeth, looking more like a bat now than ever.

"Do what each one of you is most capable of. Use it in the right way, in the offending way and we'll have her eagerly waiting to run out of Hogwarts like she's being chased by ten dragons. Use your talents to your maximum potential." Professor Flitwick jumped enthusiastically, pumping his fist in the air. "Let's do this!"

"For Hogwarts!" Professor Sprout screeched.

"For Hogwarts!"

It seemed that the war cry uttered by each and every person present in the Great Hall was echoing through each of their ears again and again just as it was ricocheting around the walls of their hearts.

Perhaps, what Dolores Jane Umbridge had had to endure in the last few days was nothing compared to what she would have to endure now, now that it wasn't just Dumbledore's Army and a few others who were fighting for what was right. Oh no, now, the entire student body and the Professors of Hogwarts were fighting for it together.

* * *

Professor McGonagall was seated at the alumni table, eyeing Umbridge as though she was contemplating how her toad of a head would look, hung on the wall behind the alumni table like a souvenir for a job well done.

A sudden shout of pain distracted her from her reverie and she swivelled around to look at Umbridge whose face had turned as red as a tomato. She was staring in horror at an incredibly scrumptious piece of cake, as though it was going to grow legs and teeth and gobble her up whole. She was also clutching her jaw as though they were paining a lot, which they were.

"Wha' is the matter, Professor Umbridge? Did yer eat something tha' didn' sit well with yer?" Hagrid asked, faking concern and trying not to laugh out loud at her expression.

Once she'd regained her lost senses and the normal colour of her face, Umbridge looked just about ready to kill. "What was that?! It was as hard as a ROCK!" she screeched.

McGonagall's sharp eyesight didn't fail to miss the way Hagrid winked at Ron Weasley, and, assuming it was just another prank they'd thought up, sat back down onto her seat with a huff. "Honestly, Professor Umbridge, I didn't know your teeth were so weak. The cake is absolutely fine. See?"

She took a huge bite of a piece of cake right in front of her and smiled innocently at her.

Looking suspiciously around at each and every person who had assembled in the Great Hall for dinner, Umbridge quickly stood up from her seat and began power-walking towards the entrance of the Great Hall, so intent on walking out of there alive, that she missed the mischievous look in McGonagall's eyes.

With a lazy flick of McGonagall's wand, Umbridge no longer stood where she had been standing just a second ago. Instead, there stood a centaur – from the waist-up, it was Umbridge but from the waist-down, she was a horse.

As soon as Umbridge realised just what had happened, she shrieked and began backing away from the Great Hall as fast as she could, considering she had to work with four legs and not two. She was gaining speed faster than she herself thought she could, but she wasn't about to complain.

Just as she reached the doors of the Great Hall, they slammed shut with a loud bang. She frowned as she spun around to see who had dared to create an obstacle in her path, only to find all the Professors with their wands pointed right at her head. She gulped.

Professor Snape, with a snarl on his face, quickly conjured up a cauldron with some potion or another simmering ominously in it. Quick as lightening, Professor Flitwick charmed her to become about as big as, say, Mrs. Norris, Filch's cat.

Umbridge squeaked in terror as she watched Professor Sprout walk alarmingly closer and closer to her and then pick her up in her arms, careful to squeeze her just as one would squeeze a lemon, so that her eyes popped out of her sickly skull.

She scrambled and hissed and pushed and pulled and screamed and tried just about everything she could to escape Professor Sprout's tight hold, but her efforts proved to be completely futile. She just couldn't escape her hold.

Soon enough, she'd been brought to the alumni table and unceremoniously dumped into the cauldron which was boiling hot. Wearing protective gloves, Severus quickly pushed her in so that not even the top of her head could be seen on the surface of the simmering potion. Keeping her there for as long as it would take for her to lose her breath, he pulled her back up to the background of protests from all the students of Hogwarts.

"Woah! I always thought Snape was an old bat but drowning Umbitch in his cauldron of potion is so damn cool that he's become my most favourite teacher. For now, of course. Did I mention how cool that is?" Seamus Finnigan was heard whispering to Dean Thomas.

"Arctic." Was Dean's awe-struck reply.

Severus repeated this process until he was sure his part of revenge-acquiring had been done, before he let go of her, dripping in his potion, skin red and blotchy due to various burns she may have sustained and anger at the very tip of her nose.

Giving her no time to recuperate, Peeves swooped down upon her and dumped ten bucket-fulls of ice cold water. Cackling madly, he lunged away from her, amidst intense joy, praise and applause from everyone else.

In an insane moment of lapse of judgement (or at least, that is what they were going to plead if caught), Angelina Johnson and Katie Bell each performed their own tricks on her. Angelina conjured shoes for each of Umbridge's hooves and charmed them to tap-dance while Katie decided to practice a spell which her aunt had taught her – one that would cause the victim to start opera singing at the highest pitch until charmed otherwise. She let this go on until Umbridge looked like she was going to die just from singing.

In a rare stroke of intense intelligence, Ron Weasley managed to stuff the worst flavoured beans of Bertie Bott's Every Flavoured Beans down Umbridge's throat even though he was a few metres away from where she was standing.

Irritated with her attempts to scream and alert Filch or any other person who would be likely to help her, he hastily glued her tongue to the roof of her mouth, effectively cutting off her desperate cry for help.

Blaise Zabini, intent on teaching her a lesson and choosing to take a leaf out of Dobby's book, charmed the bludger that he'd taken from Madam Hooch into following Umbridge around and had a good laugh as he watched her fumble her way around the Great Hall, trying to escape the bludger, stop her shoes from tap- dancing and coping up with the extra burden of another pair of legs and a TAIL.

Ernie McMillan decided now was the best opportunity to fulfil his childish curiosity to see what would happen if he lit a horse's tail on fire and knowing that if he satisfied his curiosity by attempting this on Umbridge's tail, he's not get into any trouble, did just that. Lit her tail on fire which wouldn't be put off, no matter what Umbridge tried.

Satisfied with their revenge, the student body of Hogwarts opened the doors and watched with barely suppressed triumph, joy, bliss, cheerfulness and any other emotion that came close, as Umbridge wobbled to get as far away from that place as possible, stray projectiles of breakfast samples flying over her head, some even hitting her spot-on.

"YAY! WE DID IT! SHE'S GONE!"

"THAT WAS BLOODY BRILLIANT, I TELL YOU!"

"HOLY SLYTHERIN, THAT TOAD SO DESERVED IT. BESIDES, IT WAS FUN."

All the inhabitants of Hogwarts were beyond elated. They were ecstatic. Well, they were until Cornelius Fudge's booming voice rang in each of their ears.

"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!"

Oops! Well, that isn't a problem anyway. They sure knew the art of making dumb and sadistic Ministry Officials run away screaming like headless chickens.

Soon enough, the only thought in Fudge's miniscule brain was…

 _ **Uh-oh!**_

* * *

 _ **And there we go, guys! It is finally done. Yes, this is the last chapter of Hell Hath No Fury Like Hogwarts Scorned.**_

 _ **I hope you enjoyed it a lot and that it made you laugh so much your stomachs ached. Thank you for reading this story, favourite-ing it and reviewing it.**_

 _ **I'll take your leave now, so I may work on a new story that I got the idea for in the dead of the night when I was trying to sleep but was unable to.**_

 _ **Loads of Love,**_

 _ **QuillDragon23746.**_

 _ **P.S. Look out for my new story, 'Riptide' which is a crossover of Percy Jackson and Harry Potter.**_

 _ **Mischief Managed.**_


	16. Author's Note: This isn't OVER!

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Hi, guys!

Okay, so this is basically just to let you all know that once my exams get over (2 MORE DAYS TO GO!), I'm going to take it upon myself to edit and re-edit HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE HOGWARTS SCORNED.

Not only that, my brain has finally decided to aid me in the quest of finding even more pranks to ensure Umbitch's torture/ humiliation. So, I've decided to make this story not only a series of anecdotes of the pranks, but also a full-fledged story, complete with a proper plot. I want to continue this story further, and I was hoping you'll all support my decision.

Anyway, not to bother you further, Thank you all so much for your love and support.

Quilldragon23746.

P.S. Do keep reviewing. They ensure I update faster... and maybe, you have any pranks you want Umbitch to suffer through, please let me know.

P.S.S. you won't be disappointed.

P.S.S.S. I know I said that this story was finished, but I couldn't resist. You don't blame me, do you?


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